My collge and life

k..i am 18 ..almost 19..i feel like i cant talk to anyone..about ..my..feelings...so i have come here...i do have freinds but..its hard to talk to them....this is my first year at college ...and i kinda find my studies really hard ..i feel kinda lost..(i say really weird n dumb stuff..sometimes..now my image is like i m some dumbo n nice person..like literally !it wasn't like this before ..i think...my freinds kinda laugh at me n call me dumbo in jokes) i lose concentration some how..i forget stuff..!....studies are kinda pressure on me...because ..my parents wanted me to wait one year ..and work and help them out little bit ...but i didn't ..i dont know if i should have ..should i have ?...IDk....and in college ..i found freinds easliy kinda..and this guy ..i think ..i like him...but i dont know..if he likes me ..one of my freinds did tell me he does like me ..but he doesn't say anything ..we just hangout..but its weird..i dont know anything about dating ...i dont know if its just ..like attraction or what ..and i am scared ..i dont know if he would like me forever !!( I KINDA WANT A GUY TO DO THT ..TO LOVE ME FOREVER..I M KINDA ONE GUY ..GIRL) ..i kinda think about him all the time..he z not even tht good looking...but still...sometimes i just feel..really..sad n weird...my heart kinda aches when I think aboout him..!..:S...i know THESE ARE lots of problems...but..just kinda needs ..advice..from someone! :(

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