Miss. S. Day

by Sophie
(s.yorkshire)

I've fallen in love with this man I went out with a few months ago but then I found out he was living with his ex who was actually his girlfriend, it broke my heart so much but I gave him another chance, it's just now every time something bad happens such as having an argument with a friend I take it all out on him and I loose my temper with him a lot, please help me.

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Oct 02, 2008
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Unresolved Anger
by: Cody

Hi there, Probably what is happening here is that you have unresolved anger with this man from the way he treated you in the past.

The problem with this is that when things happen in the present you tend to over react, the present event is just a trigger to release the anger that you have stored up. Have you even talk to him about the past and how what he did made you feel? Until you have fully dealt with this you will probably continue to get angry with him about things he hasn't done in the present.

You might well be angry with the broken trust or just the hurt that he has caused, and arguments with friends etc, are just putting you in touch with those feelings. Our minds tend to suppress emotions until a time we are capable of dealing with them, maybe now is the time to deal with them?

Another way to help this is to find the lesson in what has happened, generally when we are able to find the lesson that is contained in the pain we are then able to release the negative emotions that go with that and get on with our lives. So two things really:

1. Talk to him about how he has made you feel.

2. Look for the lesson so you can let go of the negative emotions.

Best of luck, I hope that helps.

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